A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
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