TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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