i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
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I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
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Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
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