dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
