Sponge bath it is.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
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