the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Randomize
