Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
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dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
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He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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