You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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