just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pants are for mortals
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize