I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
She announced her abortion via fbk
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Randomize
