I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
i out mim tonsoeep
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