I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
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