perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
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Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
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Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
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