Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
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