just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize