Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
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