is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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