i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
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