I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
