no, he came in my armpit
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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