you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
no you cant smoke seaweed
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
