I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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