He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize