you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
