And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
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