Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Randomize
