; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
should my penis look like a turkey
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
