your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
