Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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