Kiss
Puke
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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