bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Randomize
