never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Randomize
