everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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