And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
