we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
