We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
