You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
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I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
love makes seman taste better
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
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I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
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