Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
there is glitter all over my balls
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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