pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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