I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
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