We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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