I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦🏼♀️
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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