If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Randomize
