are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Randomize
