Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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