Me. At least after what I've been through.
I need to stop coming to work sober
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
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