Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Randomize
