it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen