I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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