we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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